How Things are Going

After receiving some inquiries from family/friends about how life is now that Ryan is in medical school, it occurred to me that I've done a lot of posts about what we've been doing, but I've written very little about how things are actually going. SO, my apologies, and I hope to remedy that today!

To sum it up, things are going very well! Life is different, but so very, very good. This new phase has offered us some structure that we lacked before, and it has been SO good for our family. Perhaps the easiest way to describe our life is to give a snapshot of a day:

Abe continues to be our alarm clock, waking us up around 6 AM. I used to lament the fact that many of my friends had children who sleep until 8, 9, some even 10 o'clock! Now, I see that Abe's early wake-up time has actually been a wonderful blessing, as it has given us the opportunity to spend time together as a family in the mornings too, time that we don't have as much of in the evenings anymore. Abe helps me prepare breakfast while Ryan showers and dresses, and we eat together as a family every morning. Ryan does a brief family devotion afterward. We then have time to talk and just be together for a bit before Ryan leaves around 7:30. From then until 5-5:30 PM, Ryan is at school, and Abe and I are at home.

When Ryan gets home, he hangs out with Abe while I finish dinner. We usually eat from 5:30-6. After dinner, we have a Bible reading and prayer, and then Ryan and Abe play while I clean up dinner. When we lived in Peoria, it was easy to forgo our after dinner devotions, because there was always time "later". Now, without this "later" option available, we have taken advantage of the time we do have, and while I am certainly an advocate of personal Bible time too, we have been amazed at how powerful it has been for our family, together, to be washed in the water of the Word on a daily basis. For Abe, his after dinner playtime with Daddy is very special--he knows that every night, after we're done eating, he and Daddy get to play together.

Around 6:30, I'm done cleaning up, so Ryan starts studying (in our room with the door closed), and Abe and I play, he takes a bath, etc., until 8 PM. We usually don't interrupt Ryan during this time, but we certainly aren't banned from the room! (Abe always has to show Daddy when he goes potty--he says, "Show Daddy? Daddy proud me." So we go get Ryan, and Ryan comes out to see and then praises Abe!).

At 8:00, we have family time for about 20 minutes--sometimes we'll play a game or do a puzzle, sometimes we'll watch a VeggieTales or read a story. Then Abe gets ready for bed, we say his prayers, and tuck him in. He is almost always in bed by 8:30.

From 8:30-9:30, Ryan studies again, usually in the living room with me now since the little guy is sleeping and not vying for his attention! Then at 9:30, we have "us" time for half an hour or so. We try to be in bed between 10-10:30 each night.

The next morning, Repeat! It sounds pretty rigid, but surprisingly, it has been so good for our family. I've been amazed at how good it's been for Abe too. There's never any fussing or complaining when it's time to go to bed or leave Daddy alone or whatever it may be, because he knows that's how it goes every day. After he finishes brushing his teeth, he'll run into his room, sit down, fold his hands, and say, "Now pray!" He seems to really enjoy his routine. And of course, there are some days when the routine is thrown off, like tomorrow night for instance, when we're going to some friends' home for dinner.

Our evenings are definitely different than they used to be. Where before we had all evening as a family, now we only have short segments of time, but it's actually been okay. I don't feel at all neglected or overwhelmed, and I'm savoring this time, because I know that in the next few years, Ryan will be away much more than he is now! Now, I'm so thankful that he can at least be in the same place, albeit with the door closed. We still enjoy having his presence nearby.

I received an email the other day from a woman whose husband went through medical school many years ago-she also had young children while they went through both medical school and residency. She wrote, "I won't say that it wasn't hard, cause it was hard at times (real life)"--basically stating that their journey wasn't a breeze, but it was just life, their life, just as this is ours. We will have our triumphs and our difficulties just like everyone else. And yeah, when many of our friends are buying homes, advancing in their work, etc., and we're still living on a meager budget in a rental, it's hard sometimes. Making friends with some of Ryan's classmates' wives has been so wonderful for me in this regard. On another level, it's also frustrating sometimes when I'm worn out, I've just settled in with a book, and I don't really feel like going to see what Abe needs when he's crying from his crib--I'd rather stay cuddled up and ask Ryan to do it! Where we would have shared those responsibilities before, I now take care of that so he can continue to study. I know that those small things are a tremendous help to him.

On exam weeks, Ryan usually stays at school until right before Abe goes to bed, with studying being more intense on those days. It leaves me alone with Abe for pretty long periods of time, but it sure is sweet when Ryan is finally home! We're learning that our time together is quality over quantity.

Anyway, that was rather lengthy and wordy! I hope you followed along. I know life will continue to change, especially with the new baby and longer hours for Ryan in the years ahead. But, the Lord has shown Himself to be so faithful. I'm certain that the joy that encapsulates our marriage and our home has been bestowed upon us by our Father in Heaven, and I'm so exceedingly thankful to Him for His good gifts!